Saturday, December 20, 2008
Single and somewhat satisfied
Being single definitely has its benefits. I come and go as I please, answer to no one, and pretty much do whatever I want to. The only issue is that when all of the running around is done, I am alone. Always. Most days I'm ok with my living situation, and today is one of them. However, there are days when I would like to have a warm body to lay next to. Someone to have silly conversations with. Someone to make love to. Someone to plan a future with. You get the drift.
Being a member of the LGBT community, I have found it difficult to find men of substance. When I was in my 20s and had first relocated to the Atlanta area, I went through this stage where I would meet guys on the internet or chatlines, go to the clubs a few times, and attempt to form relationships. Without fail, each dude I met wanted to become sexual after a few weeks. Desperate though I was, I never gave in. Once they saw that my drawers were comfortable attached to my waist, the phonecalls, IMs, and e-mails abruptly stopped.
That's part of the problem. Unlike our heterosexual counterparts, it is very rare that we can have encounters in non-gay places. What I am suggesting is that we almost HAVE to go to the clubs in order to meet people. I've seen plenty of hot guys that I would have loved to initiate contact. However, given that I absolutely lack gaydar, I can never determine if the man is gay or not. We all know that guessing incorrectly can have serious consequences. Supposedly, there's this look that people "in the life" give one another. Personally, I think it's bullshit.
So the question is, where are all of the employed, goal-oriented, spiritual, loving, compassionate, committment-focused, monogamous, gay men? In Atlanta, we seem to be a dying breed. What's a man to do? Return to the tired-ass clubs and hang out with the tweens? Spend $3.99/minute to hear bogus messages left by dudes who are looking for hookups? Not at all. I think I'll wait for E-Harmony to create the gay-friendly sight: Compatible Partners.com.